Pipe Down, LDT

from TremendousUpsidePotential.com...

BobbyStompy bitches about the Chargers, everyone else wonders why he doesn't just appreciate the Patriots' Super Bowl birth

A lot of people hate the New England Patriots. I get that. A lot of people seem to hate the San Diego Chargers, too. I get that. But what I fail to understand is how LaDainian Tomlinson -- or as I like to call him, "No Gain" LaDain -- gets a pass from most Charger haters. You usually here stuff like, "yeah Rivers and Merriman are so cocky, but LT is a class act." Are you kidding me?


Listen, I know the Patriots have their fair share of bastards (Rodney Harrison comes to mind), and I also feel very unqualified to assess Chargers center Nick Hardwick's venomous statements about Patriot DT Richard Seymour, who I always thought was a nice guy. Hey, I'm not in the trenches, I have no idea what goes on. It's pretty hard to say. But while I don't see everything that goes on between defensive and offensive linemen, it was pretty hard to miss what was happening on the San Diego sideline this past Sunday.

After re-injuring himself early on in the AFC Championship, LDT presumably pouted on the bench for pretty much the entire game. I say presumably because you can't see a damn thing behind that visor of his. For all we know, he paid a body double to sit out in the cold while he watched the game in a locker room hot tub.

This post at the Jack Bauer of SEO sums up my sentiment perfectly (via Deadspin):

And my biggest problem is with LT. He just sat on the bench all day feeling sorry for himself. Hey, aren't you supposed to be a leader on that team? Get your butt up and cheer your teammates on, offer advice and help to Turner and Sproiles. Do something! I watched Sam Madison last week in street clothes offer everything he could to his teammates but LT sits on the bench behind his visor and says nothing and does nothing. Just sits and watch. I guess he was just feeling sorry for himself because he couldn't play.

What's worse is his comments after the AFC divisional playoff loss last year. He says a few Patriots dancing on the Chargers logo is a reflection of the classlessness of Bill Belichick? Please. Belichick might not be a saint, but he can't control how his players celebrate. The whole thing came off as sour grapes to me.

My favorite part of his post-game from last year was when, in an incredibly serious tone, he said:

When you go to the middle of our field, when you start doing the dance that Shawne Merriman is known for, that's disrespectful to me.

Oh, really, LaDain? Was it disrespectful to you when Antonio Cromartie picked off a Tom Brady pass in the end zone and mocked the celebration that Randy Moss is known for? Or did you not see that play because you were sulking on the bench? Give me a break.

When Cromartie mocked Moss, I thought it was funny, even as a Pats fan. Though I'm still a little confused why no one -- mainstream or blogs -- has touched on Cromartie punking Randy. But whatever. It kind of reminded me of when TO danced like Ray Lewis as a touchdown celebration a few years ago. If, as a professional athlete, you have the audacity to create a celebration or dance that is specifically yours, you have to be ready for someone to mock it at some point. It's the way of the world.

Hopefully, NFL player ever does the "Hand On Head Ball Flip" (pictured above) that LDT is known for. After all, there would be hell to pay.

Bottom line: I'm not saying LDT is a bad guy, I'm just saying he's equally insane as the rest of his crazy ass team.

Nothin' But BS

from TremendousUpsidePotential.com...

After going an unprecedented 0-4 with his spread picks last week, BobbyStompy -- a glutton for punishment -- is back for league championship week

Alright, a few things about me have changed since last week's apocalypse:
1) Rejoined the sports staff at The Daily Iowan, which ups my title from "fake journalist" to the slightly more prestigious "pseudo journalist"
2) Departed from my winter break used CD store job, which ups my job description from "works with drug dealers" to "blogs with lunatics"
3) Defended potential woman beaters
4) Saw "No Country For Old Men", "There Will Be Blood", and "Cloverfield" in a four-day span, and if I've learned anything from these movies, it's that bad things always happen always

Let's pick 'em -- I've gotta get my head above water...

Chargers (+14) over PATRIOTS

Quick side note: I always thought everybody hated the Patriots except me and all the Massholes, but today's poll on DanShanoff.com was really shocking:

If you aren't a natural Patriots fan, what is the result you are rooting for?

Pats lose in AFC C.G. (27%)
Pats lose in SB XLII (27%)
Pats win SB XLII, go 19-0 (44%)

Votes so far: 616

The majority? Really? Maybe I read too many Deadspin commenters.

After New England beat the Bills by 46 in Week 11, its only covered the spread once (Week 14 against the Steelers) since then.

I look at this game and get a Pats-taking-an-early-lead vibe, followed by spirited attempts by San Diego to get itself back into the game. What I'm saying is, if the Patriots are up by something nice like 17 in the fourth quarter, the defense isn't going to have to pull out all the stops while Rivers or Volek is running a no-huddle two minute drill against a prevent. And remember, screw job covers count just as much as legit covers.

PACKERS (-7) over Giants

This line feels too low.

Don't get me wrong, I like this Giants team, I like that they're sticking it to Tiki Barber, I like that Eli is slowly morphing into the unlikely hero, I like the heart that cornerback Aaron Ross played with when his shoulder quit on him, and I loved their game plan against the Cowboys last week.

But a new week brings new challenges, and its very easy to see the Packers not only winning, but totally steamrolling New York in the process. That cold Wisconsin night is going to be brutal.

* * *

Oh, and for all of you who hate me and my Patriots, I hope it brings you some solace to know that the Daily Iowan sports section meeting is at 2PM Sunday, which all but exactly coincides with Pats-Bolts kick-off.

Oh, oh, and a respectful "He Gone" to the late chess champion Bobby Fischer. I imagine if a TUP post was written about him, it would say something like "Life checkmates Bobby Fischer". It's too bad we're not in the business of chess player obits.

And The House Wins

from TremendousUpsidePotential.com...

The Art of the Oh Fer
BobbyStompy goes 0-4 against the spread in an abysmal -- yet oddly comedic -- weekend of NFL picks

First and foremost, sorry to all those that believed in me. I really, really screwed you over. After not picking any NFL games all year, I thought I'd do a nice thing for the TUP community and write a guest post, and, well, you know what ensued: it blew up in my face.

So, what exactly went wrong? Let's take a look, game by game.

The Game: Seahawks at Packers
The Pick: Seahawks (+7.5)
The Result: Fail
Level of Failure: A half disappointed shoulder shrug

To be fair, the team I thought would win this game was the eventual winner; it just so happened they won a lot more convincingly than I could have predicted.

The Twist: All of that damn snow in Green Bay ironically created a hellish atmosphere for the visiting Seattle Seahawks.

The Funny: Brett Favre's unarguably* homo-erotic snowball antics.

The X-Factor: On the Green Bay side, it had to be Ryan Grant, who literally destroyed the Seattle defense by breaking the two hundred yard mark and finding his way into the end zone three times.

For the Seahawks, it was probably Shaun Alexander, whose fat antics (fattics) gave Seattle no chance to compete. His 2.2 yards per carry cemented another disappointing season for a player who just hasn't been the same since guard Steve Hutchinson (of the University of Michigan) left via free agency.

* - all Packer fans have argued this claim

The Game: Jaguars at Patriots
The Pick: Patriots (-13)
The Result: Fail
Level of Failure: 1% cared, 99% celebrated advancement to AFC Championship

Again, another game where the team I thought would win actually won. Unfortunately, the overwhelmingly high spread caught up with the Patriots.

The Twist: Gostowski's unexpected second quarter field goal miss was the eventual difference maker in crushing New England's chance to cover the spread.

The Funny: Jacksonville's Reggie Nelson's inexplicable but subtle call-out of Tom Brady's monster game:

"It was a dump-down game," Jaguars rookie safety Reggie Nelson sniffed. "Anybody can go 26-of-28 in a dump-down game."

Was he serious? More importantly, do I care? I'm going to go with 'probably' and 'no'.

The X-Factor: Laurence Maroney. Lo-Mo, Kool Aid, whatever you want to call him. His 122 yards and 1 touchdown kept the ball on the ground and the clock moving. Had he been ineffective, perhaps the Pats could have leaned more on the pass en route to putting more points on the board. Talk about a blessing and a curse.

The Game: Chargers at Colts
The Pick: Colts (-7.5)
The Result: Fail
Level of Failure: Catastrophic

Just an unreal game that few saw coming. You're telling me that San Diego is losing their starting quarterback and running back and its still going to beat Indy on the road? I scoff at that notion. Just like I scoffed at the spread.

Now everybody scoffs at me.

Going into this game, I had a lot of questions. They got answered...

Who is Rivers throwing to? Uhhh... Vincent Jackson (7 catches, 93 yards, 1 touchdown), apparently. Chris Chambers got in on that action, too.

Is Tomlinson breaking 100 yards against a rested Colts D? Uhmmm.... I was right about that, but who cares when you've got Michael "The Burner" Turner backing you up? He had 71 yards on the ground in one of the biggest performances of his career. And all this while the former league MVP stood watching on the sidelines.

Will Manning rebound from one of the worst performances of his career? Zuhhhh... Yeah, he did, but it didn't really matter. None of the blame for this loss should fall on his shoulders. P-Mann threw for 402 yards and three touchdowns, and although critics will point to his two interceptions, both were chest passed to the DBs from his wide receivers. The bottom line is Manning is one of the most prepared players the league has ever seen, but today, the whole "it's a team game" philosophy was as evident as ever.

Is Vinatieri gonna choke in playoffs -- in a dome? Wuh.... Nope, not at all. He hit a season high field goal (47 yards) in the first half and split the uprights on all of his extra point attempts. But, like a smaller version of Manning, his play was not what derailed the Colts.

So, even though my projections that pointed to a Colts victory were -- for the most part -- accurate, they were inconsequential in the big picture. Maybe I was just asking the wrong questions.

The Twist: The injury bug was out in full force, limiting the playing time of assumed superstars LaDainian Tomlinson, Marvin Harrison, and Phillip Rivers.

The Funny: For the Chargers, it was backup QB Billy Volek going three of four and becoming the unlikely playoff hero after his game-winning QB sneak on the goal line.

For the Colts, Marvin Harrison's early fumble comes to mind. I would say Harrison has been notoriously bad in the playoffs, but the problem with that statement is the 'notorious' part. Nobody seems to realize that the guy absolutely disappears in playoff games, and because he's such a sweetheart, the mainstream media never seems to touch on it. I applaud Harrison for doing his best to come in today, but his fumble just destroyed the Colts momentum in the first half. The post-season mediocrity continues for the mustached one.

The X-Factor: The aforementioned Michael Turner simultaneously kept the clock and chains moving. His efforts eased the pressure that would have burdened Billy Volek. Forcing the rusty second stringer to make plays through the air would have been the downfall of the San Diego Super Chargers.

The Game: Giants at Cowboys
The Pick: Cowboys (-7.5)
The Result: Fail
Level of Failure: Pretty High

Great game from top to bottom. Killer penalties, heroes, goats, a rabid Texas crowd. I found myself rooting for both teams so many times throughout the course of this heated bout.

The Twist: Eli Manning's second straight playoff road win propels the Giants to an unlikely upset over the Cowboys! Eli's headed to the NFC title game while brother Peyton sits on the couch next week. Un-real.

The Funny: The AP game recap lead...

Tony Romo can go wherever he wants with Jessica Simpson now.

Poor Romo's playoff woes continue. This media firestorm around Simpson in Dallas has got to cool off, but it won't. While Simpson wasn't at the game, she did spend time with Romo during the idle wildcard week. Will crazy Texans turn this into a scapegoat? Of course. Just don't tell Matt Olsen about it.

The X-Factor: Amani Toomer (of the University of Michigan) got the ball rolling for the Giants with a 52-yard touchdown catch. He finished with four receptions, 80 yards, and two touchdowns. No. 1 wide out Plaxico Burress had one catch for five yards.

* * *

So, we had two underdogs win outright while a third underdog was able to cover. Green Bay was the only favorite to actually win. These picks have brought me shame, dishonor, and misery, and my spread cred got thrown out the window like bathwater. What a travesty.

See you next week.

Well, Someone Should Make NFL Picks, Right?

from TremendousUpsidePotential.com...

With Rickhouse off in La La Land with real people, real comments, and real ideas, I thought I'd hold the fort down this weekend with some NFL picks.

The Lock
PATRIOTS (-13) over Jaguars

Before I knew what the actual line for this game was, I set my personal line at 14. Even with a line that high, I feel no reservations about picking the Patriots in this game. They're rested, they're at home, they're undefeated, and everyone and their mother seems to be looking for any type of convoluted reason to defend the Jags as winners in this game. To me, the whole thing comes off as desperate.

The "I Scoff At Your Line" Pick
COLTS (-8) over Chargers

This game is way too easy. A few questions:

Who is Rivers throwing to? Uhhh...
Is Tomlinson breaking 100 yards against a rested Colts D? Uhmmm....
Will Manning rebound from one of the worst performances of his career? Zuhhhh...
Is Vinatieri gonna choke in playoffs -- in a dome? Wuh....

No, you're not constipated; you're trying to talk yourself into picking the Chargers.

The Funny
Seahawks (+7.5) over Packers

Is it possible that Matt Hasselbeck could be one of the coolest QBs of our generation...you know, if he wasn't bald? I'm not trying to take cheap shots, but that "we want the ball, and we're gonna score!" has held up quite nicely since its inception a few years ago. The Pack should take this game, but the Seahawks will keep it close.

The Mystery
COWBOYS (-7.5) over GIANTS

Everyone's "on the fence" game. I say Owens plays, Romo shines, and the 'Boys win in a shoot out.

Wowza, I'm Back

Hey, all,

After a ridiculously long hiatus, I'd like to start getting back into the grind of posting irregularly in this space. My goal is to mostly cover Chicago-stuff, along with Wazzu's killer men's basketball team this year. All this while blatantly ignoring the Chicago Bulls' horribly disappointing season, and keeping hope that the Blackhawks can keep their heads above water in the NHL Western Conference playoff race.

I'll probably post on the TUP site, but re-post here for the BobbyStompy regular readers (...mostly Tony Ochs).

More to come...